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Parker, Gilbert, 1860-1932

"Mrs. Falchion, Complete"

Believe me,
there is no one quite so foolish as the professional student of
character. He sees things with a glamour; he is impressionable; he
immediately begins to make a woman what he wishes her to be for his book,
not what she is; and women laugh at him when they read his books, or pity
him if they know him personally. I venture to say that I could make Mr.
Clovelly use me in a novel--not 'A Sweet Apocalypse'--as a placid lover
of fancy bazaars and Dorcas societies, instead of a very practical
person, who has seen life without the romantic eye, and knows as well the
working of a buccaneering craft--through consular papers and magisterial
trials, of course--as of a colonial Government House. But it is not worth
while trying to make him falsify my character. Besides, you are here to
amuse me."
This speech, as she made it, was pleasantly audacious and clever. I
laughed, and made a gesture of mock dissent, and she added: "Now I have
finished my lecture. Please tie my shoe-lace there, and then, as I said,
amuse me. Oh, you can, if you choose! You are clever when you like to be.
Only, this time, do not let it be a professor's wife who foolishly
destroys herself, and cuts short what might have been a brilliant
career.


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