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Watkins, Sam R.

"or, A Side Show of the Big Show"

I did not know this characteristic of the
human female at the time, or I would have taken a delicate slice of the
butter. Here is a sample of the colloquy that followed:
"Mister, have some butter?"
"Not any at present, thank you, madam."
"Well, I insist upon it; our butter is nice."
"O, I know it's nice, but my plate is full, thank you."
"Well, take some anyhow."
One of the girls spoke up and said:
"Mother, the gentleman don't wish butter."
"Well, I want him to know that our butter is clean, anyhow."
"Well, madam, if you insist upon it, there is nothing that I love so well
as warm biscuit and butter. I'll thank you for the butter."
I dive in. I go in a little too heavy. The old lady hints in a delicate
way that they sold butter. I dive in heavier. That cake of butter was
melting like snow in a red hot furnace. The old lady says, "We sell
butter to the soldiers at a mighty good price."
I dive in afresh. She says, "I get a dollar a pound for that butter,"
and I remark with a good deal of nonchalance, "Well, madam, it is worth
it," and dive in again. I did not marry one of the girls.

WE EVACUATE CHATTANOOGA
One morning while sitting around our camp fires we heard a boom, and a
bomb shell passed over our heads.


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