(III.) When stoppages (whether necessary or disciplinary) take place
between stations, preference to be given to the interior of tunnels.
All artificial light will then be cut off, and the officials of the
train will run up and down the corridors howling like wolves.
(IV.) On hearing the declaration of any would-be traveller (as
"Margate") it shall be optional for the booking-clerk to reply, "I
double Margate"; when his opponent, the public, must either pay twice
the already increased fare or forfeit the journey.
(V.) The quality of buns, pastry and sandwiches at the station
refreshment-rooms to be drastically revised. A return to be made
to the more "discouraging" models of fifty years ago, which will
be specially manufactured under the supervision of the Ministry of
Munitions.
(VI.) All the too-attractive photographs of agreeable places on
the company's service at present exhibited in the compartments to
be removed, and in place of them the frames to be filled with such
chastening subjects as "Marine Drive at Slushboro' on a Wet Evening,"
"No Bathing To-day" (Bude), or "Fac-simile of a typical week-end bill
at the Hotel Superb, Shrimpville.
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